Learn to Live Big

A few things I’ve learned in the past month:

-I must believe I deserve the things I want.
-I must ask for exactly what I want, the maximum. Do not stop at “realistic”, be honest.
-Things always work out in my favor.
-There is not a person on Earth who can rival the power my grandmother’s spirits have over and in my life.
-Taking one small step every day, doing the tiniest thing related to my goals allows the path to appear.
-My inner pre-teen is my inner saboteur. She can rest now.

A few things I’ve learned over the years and won’t continue to run from:

-Playing small is not humility, humility is gratitude.
-I can do so much, I just need to try.
-I create by speaking.
-I don’t need to know when, I need to be ready.
-I can’t do it all alone, I need to ask for help.

It’s so lovely to now be at a place in my life where I can recognize dead things and let them go. I can plan my departure and build a new arena. There was a time when I held on to dead things for fear of not finding anything else out in the world. I thought the crumb of something was better than nothing. It was exhausting and betraying. My life was never going to be “nothing”.  I trust that the work I am doing will take me to “everything”. 

Every need, every desire, every vision will all come to me. It is not my business to know when or to even ask. My job is to prepare myself. To slow down, listen, ask for help, cross-check, and try what feels right. Faith, gut, feelings, doubting them is not how I’m supposed to live. My life will be stifled if I fail to follow my instincts. 

A part of me fears this. I don’t want to move in arrogance. That self-awareness is enough for me to know that I’m not waiting for abundance to be handed to me. I am doing my part to be ready; I am doing my work. I cannot assume or trouble my mind with how this may look to other people. That is not my problem or my business. Again, my business is to prepare. I will remind myself of this daily. We cannot go back, there’s nothing there. Everything that is for me is down the path and around the bend.